ken's bars

Monday: “should’ve broke it off to date myself you didn’t deserve me at all” – evergreen by omar apollo

rise and shine girlies it’s the first week of hell semester! aka we’re starting 20 hour weeks so practice will be 2 hours for 6 days a week not including lift, individual meetings and small group work. and our first game is in a 2 weeks. eek! i do enjoy season a lot but it is very tiring for ones mental, physical and emotional health. this year we’re going into season a little heartbroken… which ive done before… and it was my best high school season ever… so ig now it’s just college edition. for the first time in college ever i feel like i might have it together… don’t call it a comeback ❤

i had a lot of interceptions during practice and the field was pretty much covered in snow and ice so each person on the team has to take a shift clearing it off. i took my shift around 10 with the speaker… blasting drake bc… as stated before… this better be my season of a lifetime. 

i had classical mythology, history, and psychology today and i made it 2/3 classes which is like not good but i have yet to master the “get ready for the entire day in 30 minutes” thing. because i like to dress up everyday… and do my makeup… and do any hair… and shower after practice? anyways the fire alarm in my building was broken and kept going off from like 5-8 ish which was really great because it ran straight through my therapy session : )

Tuesday: “you’ll find moonlit nights strangely empty because when you call my name through them there will be no answer” – cigarettes out the window by tv girl

everyday gets better (it’s been one day). but i heal relatively fast? and i take pride in the fact that i treat everyone the way i want to be treated and God will get his lick back i have no doubt. i had accounting and business problem solving today which i do really enjoy actually. i have accounting with my good friend which makes the class infinitely better.

problem solving is kinda fun to me so i eat those classes up! especially when i take my meds… babe you cannot stop me from succeeding in there. i need more friends (we knewww this) but seriously. like i was so anti social my freshman year and it is coming back to bite me. i got punch out with my roommate and i always get a pesto alfredo pasta with mushrooms, spinach, and chicken. but today i added tomatoes for some extra iron. twas delicious. and it served as my first meal of the day because i don’t have enough time for breakfast so i just snack through it… trying to fix that too. outfit was cute: aqua corduroy cargos, gray black and white color block sweater, and white docs. i finally went to the mailroom because i literally had 5 packages. and they were threatening to return my stuff. anyways the suite took a nap together and our teammate came down to chat. day was pretty good, rate 6.8/10

Wednesday: “and she knows, she knows, and i know she knows, and i know she knows” – she knows by j cole (cults version works too)

good morning soldiers, i am feeling much better this morning but i didn’t sleep very well bc of my silly little nap. practice was v good, afterwards i had my individual lacrosse meeting and my assistant coach twisted my hair during my classical mythology class.

then i trotted over to my history class and made it on time! v small win for the week. i finished my accounting homework and other like small academic maintenance things. after that i chatted with some of my teammates and went back homesies. my suitemates and i had a practice debrief and then split for class.  we decided to get dinner together and literally like cried laugh the entire time and stayed way longer than what we needed to. i didnt have anything to do when i got home so i was in the bed by like 8? but i still cannot sleep. so i didnt head to bed until like 12. 

Thursday: “mark my words, ima ball without you” – throw away by future

literally debating on even writing about this treacherous day. i fear every time i encounter new information i have less and less of a will to live. but me march on ig? i just feel incredibly disrespected. ive never been like treated like this before, it’s wild. very much in shock and like im not really even processing what is even happening anymore. practice and lift was good this morning, its probably my favorite part of the day cause i can work through the chest pains. which honestly arent too bad? theyre really faint but constant.

my roommate and i were extremely late to our 9:40 classes but we didn’t like the outfits we had already picked out… and i beat my face for school. you never know who you’re gonna run into! and getting ready is like my favorite part of the day. anyways i dont like being late to accounting cause it is one of my favorite classes but i actually knew what was going on when i got there. so its all okay. then i went to business problem solving and was told to solve one of the questions up on the board… and tell me why i got up there and blanked. it was very very embarrassing. i solved it but it wasnt very smooth and people were still confused when i was done. but hey i tried my best.

i really need a friend in that class. like so badly. it would make me feel better. anyways then i met my teammates for soul food thursday… would have to rate like 7/10… cornbread wasnt good, i like my mac and cheese a little more baked, but the yams were delicious. 

afterwards i went home and got ready to go to a meeting. im an intern for my teammates management company which provides me with a lot of cool experiences in the marketing field. the meeting was an hour away??? i got in the uber expecting like a 20 minute ride and was sorely mistaken. im so glad my other teammate, who i dragged along with me, checked the location. once we got there, i got to talk to some people in entrepreneurship about my blog and offer some ideas on a new business idea. then i went home, got chipotle and hung out with my suitemates until bedtime!

Friday: “lying to my face… thought you wouldve shown a little grace” – you broke my heart by drake

and i thought yesterday was bad. wow was i not prepared for TODAY oh my goodness. i think today i really solidified the “out of sight out of mind” technique right after i asked my mommy to buy my a plane ticket home. it was so warm outside today! practice was really something. we did so much running at the end of practice and i did really well because… well i have a real deep emotional drive right now… you could say. it was super warm today and i wanted to wear my reformation jeans that have literally sat in my drawer this entire year and have yet to be equipped. they normally fit perfectly but i think im losing weight right now because they’re a little loser in the waist than i remember. i looked super cutie so i took a million pictures of myself, naturally.

then i went to study hall and finished my last class of the day. i met up with my teammate to possibly go to the yard later that day but nothing ended up happening. a bunch of my teammates ended up coming over so we just  hung out for a while. after that… i literally experienced heartbreak for a second time basically. and the worst part was that i literally had accounting homework to complete. so i didn’t even have time to like feel what i was feeling. i got a 100% on the homework. academic weapon even in the presence of peril. i went to sleep after that. and slept pretty well !

Saturday: “i can still see you at the place out there when i close my eyes” – remember when by wallows

good morning girlies! i woke up in a very springy mood to an empty suite. today was actually really really good. like 9/10 type of day. i had practice and was pretty distracted because obviously this entire week has been the epitome of trash. and like it continued to get worse? so yk my brain was a little tired. i still did pretty well by the end of practice and we had a little mini scrimmage. then my suitemate and i went went to breaky! i fear i did not actually eat much but i got a little closure, like i actually got to a point where i could see myself forgiving him. not anytime soon. but eventually.

we made it back home and got ready to have an entire day together at georgetown. we got ready and took the metro and then like gave up lol. we just went to dinner at shake shack but i was enjoying myself! we took the metro back and then i completed my business problem solving homework and got ready for a date. CHILL ON ME. the date was actually so very cutie pie. we went ice skating in the rain. his car was nice. conversation was natural and cute! i had a good time (little thank you to my suitemate for forcing me to go even though i thought i was going to fall asleep on the way home from georgetown)!and he drove like an hour to DC for the date?? hello?? so kind. i got back around 11, facetimed my mom, and passed out in the bed.