ken's bars

A sunny disposition means you radiate positivity even when shit hits the fan. Attempting to find joy in the little things around you and choosing to broadcast happiness can majorly affect how you view life. Even though having a sunny disposition will have more of an overall impact on you, it’s easiest to propel yourself in that direction when you think of it from someone else’s point of view. You want to appear as a sunny person in other people’s eyes. This perspective will allow you to consciously work on your positive outlook. 

• Practice Gratitude
  • As a person who has a chronic hatred for any company in the morning, it is easiest for me to practice gratitude to help myself wake up every day. A gratitude journal is a common way to note down your appreciation for life’s gifts. However, I want to take it a step further. When your gratitude reflects a person in your life, you should take action in thanking these people and reminding them how much they mean to you. It does not have to be a direct text that says, “good morning babes im in the middle of my gratitude journal and i just wanted to let you know that you are today’s subject! thanks for being you girly!” I mean you totally could but I want to start asking that person to breakfast, offering support for current troubles in their life, writing them a letter, buying them flowers, etc. This way, I can show my gratitude for them in a love language that makes them feel cared for. 
• Focus on the positive
  • As an athlete, I know about troubles that can effect a whole group. Running punishments, late bus drivers, no towels for the shower, etc. There is a stark difference between the complainers and those who just take it and move on. I am so incredibly guilty of being a complainer. It brings you comfort for about 30 seconds before you’re absolutely miserable again. It’s so easy to think that your situation is much worse when in reality, the problem is plaguing the entire group and some people just accept it much quicker than you. If you’re the funny girly, go ahead and make the joke, laugh, and then put your head down and face whatever is ahead. Originally I was going to talk about “reminding yourself of what’s going right in your life” but I think that’s bullshit and can lead to extreme self gaslighting. If you’re not delusional you can take a step back and look at the good compared to the bad and realize that you’re better off than most. I also try and look at unfortunate events as learning experiences. I got rejected from like 10 internship opportunities and that crushed my feelings. A lot. But I know exactly what I did wrong and I know what to fix for next summer. I have familiarized myself with the cooperate application process and I know how to tweak and perfect my resumes and cover letters for future job opportunities. The benefits of a shitty situation are sometimes very difficult to find but I try to envision what advice I would give to someone else and stay honest with myself. **Obviously I am not talking about serious traumas**
• Surround yourself with positive people
  • Building on the last paragraph, no one likes to be around excessive complainers. It’s actually infuriating I’m sorry I just can’t do it. A lot of complainers use it as a coping mechanism or they think complaining = humor… If you are a chronic complainer: It’s literally totally okay to admit that you’re excited or worried. A straightforward way to weed out your extremely negative friends is to purposefully get close with people who make you feel good. You might notice that these people tend to have sunny dispositions. Take note of how people make you feel after you’re done hanging out with them. If you’re excited to talk with them again and you feel recharged afterwards, that’s a great sign. If you need to destress after seeing them… I hate to be the one to break it to you but maybe that isn’t your person, lovebug. Get well soon! 
  • Sidebar: If you are an extreme introvert, it might be normal to feel drained after hanging out with someone for an extended amount of time. Instead it might be better to gauge how you feel about that person the next day, or when you’re just texting them. 
• Take care of yourself
  • “Self love is the best love” Listen up pookies. You need to spend time with yourself to be the best person for, most importantly, you and others. Get to know yourself, do things you genuinely enjoy, spend time in nature, create morning and night routines, and nurture your hobbies. You deserve so much love and care. I probably go through a different phase every month, and every time I switch my phase there is a different ideal version of myself living in my head. When I go to take care of myself I oftentimes imagine what the version of Kendall is doing to take care of herself and I mimic it. I end up feeling more in touch with myself and I feel very refreshed and recharged afterwards.

Listen I know I am a complainer. Buttttttt these are some of the steps that I am taking to try and be a better person. Kisses and smooches!